I've moved into my new flat, at last, but there is no Internet connection, so I'm snatching moments out of a heavy heavy week at school.
I will post properly, with all the juicy details, in a day or three.
Friday, 29 August 2008
Wednesday, 20 August 2008
Zak Wood v3.0
Yip, it's coming like a steamtrain. V3.0 of... Meee! I am 30 in 2 months and a couple of days.
Back in my comfortable, strange, not quite sure what I was doing life, I had looked into booking a brewery in Himeville for the occasion, which was going to result in a great deal of debauchery and a truly obscene amount of fun.
I am, however, no longer in the good old South of Africa, so that's not gonna happen, as they say in the classics.
Now, the big reason I wanted a mahoosive thirtieth in SA was so that I could invite my closest friends, and get to say "Hi", and quite probably "Thanks for being a cool person - you've added value to my life". This , or those that don't know, is the same reason I try to have a biggish birthday every year.
Now, I'm going to be having a party in Huizhou, and it's still going to be drunken and debaucherous, and possibly still held in a brewery, but as much as I enjoy the people here, I miss you.
So here I'm opening up the floor and looking for some suggestions on how I can share the day with you. Maybe something virtual, maybe a blog post, maybe a direct upload of photos from around the world on the day - I don't know.
Please post any ideas as comments, so that people can discuss them.
Back in my comfortable, strange, not quite sure what I was doing life, I had looked into booking a brewery in Himeville for the occasion, which was going to result in a great deal of debauchery and a truly obscene amount of fun.
I am, however, no longer in the good old South of Africa, so that's not gonna happen, as they say in the classics.
Now, the big reason I wanted a mahoosive thirtieth in SA was so that I could invite my closest friends, and get to say "Hi",
Now, I'm going to be having a party in Huizhou, and it's still going to be drunken and debaucherous, and possibly still held in a brewery, but as much as I enjoy the people here, I miss you.
So here I'm opening up the floor and looking for some suggestions on how I can share the day with you. Maybe something virtual, maybe a blog post, maybe a direct upload of photos from around the world on the day - I don't know.
Please post any ideas as comments, so that people can discuss them.
Wednesday, 13 August 2008
Something I forgot
When I bought the ergo, I went down to the rowing course in Hong Kong. It is, in a word, fantastic! It's about 3500m of dead straight, 10 lane wide, canal - high walls on either side, and a bridge plus a turn at either end which reduces the wind.
So I walked into one of the clubs there, where I had a great chat with a very friendly guy, whose English was... not great, and since I know zero Cantonese, we settled on speaking a little English and a little Pu tong hua (The dialect of Mandarin which I... have heard).
Anyway, the point of the story. While I was there, I asked if I could have a paddle at some stage (not that day, since I didn't have anything with me), or even if I could join the club. He took me up to the administrator, and explained the story to the guy, who said absolutely I could join, and very efficiently took me through the process and prices.
Right up until the point where he said I had to complete a novice course first. I explained that while I'm not exactly A grade material, I am competent in a boat, and I have been rowing for a little under 17 years now. Nope, tough, have to do the novice course, because I haven't yet rowed in Hong Kong.
Fair enough. The problem, and this was where it all broke down, is that the course is only held on Saturday and Sunday, meaning I can't do it, since I work those days. Dammit!
So now I'm erging.
So I walked into one of the clubs there, where I had a great chat with a very friendly guy, whose English was... not great, and since I know zero Cantonese, we settled on speaking a little English and a little Pu tong hua (The dialect of Mandarin which I... have heard).
Anyway, the point of the story. While I was there, I asked if I could have a paddle at some stage (not that day, since I didn't have anything with me), or even if I could join the club. He took me up to the administrator, and explained the story to the guy, who said absolutely I could join, and very efficiently took me through the process and prices.
Right up until the point where he said I had to complete a novice course first. I explained that while I'm not exactly A grade material, I am competent in a boat, and I have been rowing for a little under 17 years now. Nope, tough, have to do the novice course, because I haven't yet rowed in Hong Kong.
Fair enough. The problem, and this was where it all broke down, is that the course is only held on Saturday and Sunday, meaning I can't do it, since I work those days. Dammit!
So now I'm erging.
I see the beard and cloak, but I don't yet see a philosopher. - Aulus Gellius
Soooo... Wade (the other Saffer here) and I didn't shave for a couple of days, totally independently and for no good reason. Of course, a couple days of not shaving, leaves me with a healthy growth of stubble, and Wade is much the same.
Naturally, some wise-smart-alec-arse asked whether we were having a competition, which immediately meant that we were. So now I'm sitting with a three week old beard, which is definitely looking solid.
All thoughts of shaving, however, were banished from my mind, when Kelly (the female half of the New Zealand couple), mentioned at the bar a few nights ago that I should keep it, because (and I almost quote) "[I] have a funny face, and this covers it".
Bloody kiwis.
What was worse though was that all the other girls immediately agreed with her.
So I've started shaving my head instead.
Long story short, now I look like this.
Naturally, some wise-smart-alec-arse asked whether we were having a competition, which immediately meant that we were. So now I'm sitting with a three week old beard, which is definitely looking solid.
All thoughts of shaving, however, were banished from my mind, when Kelly (the female half of the New Zealand couple), mentioned at the bar a few nights ago that I should keep it, because (and I almost quote) "[I] have a funny face, and this covers it".
Bloody kiwis.
What was worse though was that all the other girls immediately agreed with her.
So I've started shaving my head instead.
Long story short, now I look like this.
Tuesday, 12 August 2008
Monday, 11 August 2008
Dancing malformation
I had a great idea the other day. In one of my classes - P5, so aged around 11 - the boys and girls seriously dislike each other, and they refuse to work together.
When I first arrived, I tried forcing the issue, but that worked like... well, like something that doesn't work at all. So then I became clever(er), and said they didn't have to, but gently used my mind control tricks to get them to do so. By the end of last term, they were almost cordial to each other.
Then they had a month holiday.
The first lesson back was such a train wreck, that I (and here comes the genius) told them to write 100 words about why the opposite sex was bad. In my head, I saw deep thought, a coherent set of arguments, and something we could discuss and debate. That's not really true - I saw nothing of the sort, but one can dream.
What I never expected was the sheer brilliance that came out of the boys. The girls didn't do it.
Below, quoted verbatim, are the two boys letters I received.
"Girls are bad because girls like cry. They are bastard. They aren't active. They all days absent-mindedness. Girls are boring, not promising, unconscionable. All the contry has not chosse a woman president. Like China's president is Hu Jing Tao. America's president is Joge Bush. Girls can't not lead a city or a contry. Some girls don't like sports. Like Girls in P5B, they are quiet. Very boring, make people laugh and abominate. I think they like dun. Girls are bad and nosiey." - Luke, P5B
"Why girls is bad.
Why girls is bad? They not very very bad, but they very crazy. They like beautiful. They like new skirts, new t-shirt, new trouser, new hairstyle. They like Bobby doll. They so babyhood. They often cry. They dance very malformation. They smile very stupid. Ok." - Danny, P5B.
God I hope Danny never watches me dance - he'll think I'm a girl.
When I first arrived, I tried forcing the issue, but that worked like... well, like something that doesn't work at all. So then I became clever(er), and said they didn't have to, but gently used my mind control tricks to get them to do so. By the end of last term, they were almost cordial to each other.
Then they had a month holiday.
The first lesson back was such a train wreck, that I (and here comes the genius) told them to write 100 words about why the opposite sex was bad. In my head, I saw deep thought, a coherent set of arguments, and something we could discuss and debate. That's not really true - I saw nothing of the sort, but one can dream.
What I never expected was the sheer brilliance that came out of the boys. The girls didn't do it.
Below, quoted verbatim, are the two boys letters I received.
"Girls are bad because girls like cry. They are bastard. They aren't active. They all days absent-mindedness. Girls are boring, not promising, unconscionable. All the contry has not chosse a woman president. Like China's president is Hu Jing Tao. America's president is Joge Bush. Girls can't not lead a city or a contry. Some girls don't like sports. Like Girls in P5B, they are quiet. Very boring, make people laugh and abominate. I think they like dun. Girls are bad and nosiey." - Luke, P5B
"Why girls is bad.
Why girls is bad? They not very very bad, but they very crazy. They like beautiful. They like new skirts, new t-shirt, new trouser, new hairstyle. They like Bobby doll. They so babyhood. They often cry. They dance very malformation. They smile very stupid. Ok." - Danny, P5B.
God I hope Danny never watches me dance - he'll think I'm a girl.
Tuesday, 05 August 2008
BTW
I can now view the blog, so please feel free to leave comments, tell me what I'm rambling on about, ask questions, etc.
Monday, 04 August 2008
What the hell?
DAMMIT! I don't know why I do this.
People who have known me for more than... 2 years now, will remember a certain impulse purchase of a certain sight-unseen birthday present for myself. It came with four wheels and was silver.
Well, I've just gotten on a bus, then a train, then two feet, and bought (seen, but not actually tried), another silver machine, that only has two wheels. Well, two little wheels for rolling it around on the floor, and a big sod-off wheel for providing air resistance while you cry and tell the world you're sorry. THEN!, I got back on two feet, in a taxi, on a train, on two feet, on a bus, in a taxi - all with a massive sodding box sitting on one shoulder.
Yes, I've bought an ergo. It seemed like a great idea this morning - I have been battling to keep up training, because I haven't really been able to find anything challenging enough, and swimming just isn't doing it for me - but a six hour round trip to Hong Kong, along with a pot load of money later, and there's a box now sitting in my room waiting for me to open it.
Only I don't know if I want to.
People who have known me for more than... 2 years now, will remember a certain impulse purchase of a certain sight-unseen birthday present for myself. It came with four wheels and was silver.
Well, I've just gotten on a bus, then a train, then two feet, and bought (seen, but not actually tried), another silver machine, that only has two wheels. Well, two little wheels for rolling it around on the floor, and a big sod-off wheel for providing air resistance while you cry and tell the world you're sorry. THEN!, I got back on two feet, in a taxi, on a train, on two feet, on a bus, in a taxi - all with a massive sodding box sitting on one shoulder.
Yes, I've bought an ergo. It seemed like a great idea this morning - I have been battling to keep up training, because I haven't really been able to find anything challenging enough, and swimming just isn't doing it for me - but a six hour round trip to Hong Kong, along with a pot load of money later, and there's a box now sitting in my room waiting for me to open it.
Only I don't know if I want to.
Saturday, 02 August 2008
All I ever wanted
Now I'm not sure if the site Sinfest.net has died, or is just blocked here in China due to it's massive political statements and huge following (sarcasm alert), but I can't get to it.
And I found it bloody difficult to find the passage I was looking for, written by Tatsuya Ishida a long long time ago, so I'm going to post it here.
Tatsuya, I know I'm breaking copyright, but dammit I think this piece needs to be seen - If you come across it, and you're unhappy, let me know.
Passage follows:
And I found it bloody difficult to find the passage I was looking for, written by Tatsuya Ishida a long long time ago, so I'm going to post it here.
Tatsuya, I know I'm breaking copyright, but dammit I think this piece needs to be seen - If you come across it, and you're unhappy, let me know.
Passage follows:
All I ever wanted in life was to be worshipped like a god, live like a rock star, drive women wild, make a fortune, live fast, die young, conquer the universe, travel the world, meet interesting people, solve the Grand Unification Theory, find the Missing Link, fight the good fight, live for the moment, seize each day, know what really matters, end world hunger, cure cancer, change the world, vanquish the dragon, save the princess, be super popular but too cool to care, climb Mount Everest, scale the Great Wall of China, swim the seven seas, howl at the moon, sound my barbaric yawp over the rooftops of the world, tag up this earth with my street name, run around with perfect conviction that my life is the meaning of life, be master of my own fate, embrace my destiny, feel as much as I can feel, think as much as I can think, do as much as I can do, get down, get up, dance to the beat of life on and on and when I’m done let the people go, "Now that was a funky
man."
man."
Friday, 01 August 2008
Unfinished stories.
I seem to have come over all nostalgic. I was browsing through my writing folder, which has grown in fits and starts over the years, and I came across this little passage, written one evening about two years ago.
A life of unfinished stories. As I sit here now, trying to finish off something that I should have completed an age ago, I look back over my writing.
Compilations, compositions, from years of jotting down the little thoughts and the big ones that came into my head.
The threads of coherent thought that I could grab and pull from the mounting noise and chaos.
Some of them are short, some a little longer. Some of them are deep and meaningful, some as shallow as a puddle.There are a few common threads though. All of them are well written. All of them have a meaning. And every single last one of them is unfinished.
What is it that my life is a collection of unfinished stories? What happens when I do finish one? What does it take to finish a story?
Needless to say, I didn't finish it.
A life of unfinished stories. As I sit here now, trying to finish off something that I should have completed an age ago, I look back over my writing.
Compilations, compositions, from years of jotting down the little thoughts and the big ones that came into my head.
The threads of coherent thought that I could grab and pull from the mounting noise and chaos.
Some of them are short, some a little longer. Some of them are deep and meaningful, some as shallow as a puddle.There are a few common threads though. All of them are well written. All of them have a meaning. And every single last one of them is unfinished.
What is it that my life is a collection of unfinished stories? What happens when I do finish one? What does it take to finish a story?
Needless to say, I didn't finish it.
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